reliving the past

Last Wednesday,  I met up with one of my closest group of friends, and after our 4 am supper, we started discussing if we could go back to some point in the past, with complete knowledge of the live you have lived thus far (E.g I go to sleep and somehow wake up as my 15 yr old self, but with complete knowledge of the life I had lived previously), how different would we live our lives? On one hand we know the different mistakes and bad choices we have made. Would we try to correct them? But on the other hand, for those that are happy where they are know, how much change are they willing to risk not being able to reach the same point?

I know the question sounds confusing as hell.

Let's use my friends as an example. Both of them are happily (recently) married, with renovation on their new flat almost done. Both of them are also quite happy with their jobs and of course our awesome group of friends.

If they were to wake up tomorrow as their twelve year old self, with full knowledge of their life as they knew it until yesterday, how much of their life would they be willing to change.

It might be small changes like eating better or exercising more. Moderate changes like hanging out with a different clique in school or a different CC. Larger changes like choosing different schools or jobs.

But with each change, you risk your new life missing an essential component of your old one. Each change, even seemingly small ones, could risk them not marrying, or even never meeting reach other. Or they would not be able to get their jobs that they love, or that we won't be friends. Of course there is the possibility that with the right changes, they can still have everything they loved about their old life, and some more. Or maybe instead of having people like me as friends, they might make better friends.

This question attracted me so much. Because even though I know how impossible it is, one of my deepest wish is to one day go to sleep, and wake up as my 12 year old self.

All of my closest friends are by virtue of my NS postings, and I have no idea how any of my decisions would affect the postings to the point that my different group of friends never met.

Question aside, as I said earlier, my deepest desire is to go to bed and wake up an earlier version of myself, but with no recollections of my teen years and my young adulthood,  and pray that by some random butterfly effect, different choices are made, and I don't end up so bitter, cynical and purposeless as I am now.

Anyway talking about living in the past, what can be more teenage - angsty than passively whine about life from a blog.
Thursday, September 18, 2014, 1:38 AM | comment | 0 comments
Date

I have just read perks of a wallflower and the whole thing just weighed me down with melancholic sadness. In a way i think I'm overreacting to this is due to me constantly wanting to live in the past and regretting mistakes I did and choices I made.

It also made me realize that even though it will be very unlikely, especially at my age and the age of any potential girl I would like to date, that I would like to date like we were 15 again; hanging out at void decks and playgrounds in the middle on the night just to talk, spend time on the phone with each other and not having to say anything, just enjoying each other's company over the line, walking around shopping centres aimlessly window shopping... 

I'm in a really weird mood now...
1:04 AM | comment | 0 comments
twitter
tagboard
links
miscs

11111

But as for me,
I watch in hope for the LORD,
I wait for God my Savior;
my God will hear me

Micah 7:7

Random Scribbles